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I kinda ignored my own advice..

.. But now I am back on track. I found a fabulous new training website which is perfect as not only am I a bit bored of my usual workouts, but my DVD player has broken as well. I am still devouring the contents, it is so good I set up a small monthly donation, and of course I am putting in the work – a mixture of HIIT, Spartan Trials and Ironborn for now. I’ve upped my protein, especially after working out. I fast for about 15 hours most days, it is easy when I don’t snack after dinner and easily last until getting home from the school run. Since fasting on the job hardly ever worked, I stopped doing it, making sure to bring a healthy meal full of protein, healthy fats and veg, as well as a snack or two, which is usually a banana and a handful of nuts.

I’ve cut the booze too. I allow myself one day of drinking a week – either Friday or Saturday, whichever is more convenient – and a small allowance of snacking to go with it. During the week, after my usual herbal tea in the evening, I have a glass of sparkling water with a squeeze of lemon or lime as it is calorie-free [isn’t it?!] and it is easy to tell myself that this is my reward. After all, you wouldn’t be able to see the vodka in it.

After only a few days  my stomach is already flatter. I will be in fighting shape in 3 months. I’ve looked at some photos from last summer – you can’t really tell I work out, which annoys me. Skinny arms, wine belly. I am also watching ‘The Biggest Loser Australia’ for the first time and a) it pleases me that Commando is Paleo and b) Shannan said in an interview that to lose the last few kilograms and/or get where you really want to be, you will need to sacrifice nearly all of your indulgences, which is what I am doing. Finally.

I am even motivated by … playing Unreal Tournament, which is all about being super fit 🙂


Booze booze booze

Nuts, nut butters, bananas, GF crackers, GF oatcakes, booze, dark chocolate – once I start, I can’t stop, also green cabbage, bread – these are all things that make me bloated and/or constipated. I shall avoid for awhile. After all, summer bodies are made in the winter. I want to feel good, look good, shed the remaining excess fat and build more muscle.

I am working on eating more mindfully and stopping when I am full, also focusing a bit more on the eating aspect as opposed to exercising.

I will focus on hand-release pushups [on my feet, not knees, duh] and burpees.

might try cold showers.

I initially wanted to try drinking like the French and Italian and having a small glass of wine with dinner, but I can’t do it – excess drinking is ingrained in me.

I will not drink or eat after my late shifts at work – I will come home and go straight to bed. There is no point whatsoever in sitting watching tv until 2 am while drinking and eating, and I eat and drink a lot in a very short amount of time. This is a good opportunity to fast. I can’t 100% promise on my Saturday shifts, I might have a drink or two with the others at the pub, but after that, I come home and straight to bed. Ditto on weekdays.

But I love to have a few drinks, so I’ll have some on Fridays and that one or two at the pub [since I’ve been delegated the double Saturday shift for the foreseeable future]. As with all my other triggers, it’s best when there is none at home during the week.

I can do this.

Adrenal Fatigue

I’ve been feeling off for a while now. Either my thyroid meds need upping [just when I am due to decrease dosage!] or I’ve got adrenal fatigue. I can’t be bothered to exercise, housework is piling up, I don’t feel as bad as the last PMS but I’m still feeling so tired most days and it’s difficult to get up in the morning.

My son Rhys is feeling off too; he’s been complaining of a tummy ache for two weeks now, vomited a couple of times at the weekend, and if I don’t put moisturising cream on his body then he complains of severe itching. He’s had a small rash around his mouth a couple of times, which makes me think of an allergic reaction; maybe it’s time for both of us to see the doctor.

I got high from eating cake batter. Seriously.

I am not as orthorexic as I used to be. I try to be mindful and keep tabs on sugar, alcohol, gluten and carbs. Recently though I have been eating a bit more of these things – just a smidge – but PMS time rolled around and girl, did it knock me out. It’s been awhile it had interfered with my normal life. On Monday I gradually felt worse and worse, until my entire body ached, my bones felt cold and I had a hollow feeling in my chest. I tried to do yoga but collapsed from the effort. I showered but the water raining on me HURT. My appetite decreased dramatically. I was so exhausted and worried about doing a 10-hour shift the next day, I arranged to shorten it to 6 hours.

That shift on Tuesday went not too badly, I came home and within the next few hours started to deteriorate [oh, and that morning I left the back door unlocked! I usually check it multiple times before heading out or going to bed!]. Bloodshot eyes, exhausted, my whole body ached, I managed a third of my dinner and spent the rest of the evening on the sofa.

Today is Wednesday, day three, I felt sluggish when I got up but on the whole not too bad,  period in full swing now after several days of spotting, and I promised D I would just rest today, not like I feel like doing much anyway. Is this the price for eating some gluten [or specifically wheat as one website put it] and sugar? It is pretty awful and 90-10 rule should be followed, rather than 80-20.

I quit sugar!

I watched the ‘That Sugar Film’ at the start of the year. Then I started following I Quit Sugar on social media. The more I read, the more I realised how addictive and dangerous sugar in all its forms is. Suffice to say, I had an inkling, given how many times I tried sitting there struggling with willpower as D or other people devoured cake and biscuits like there was no tomorrow.

For my birthday in September I received ‘That Sugar Book’, which reinforced all I knew. I quit sugar on October 3rd and for the first time ever, it was EASY. Shall I repeat that? Quitting sugar was EASY. I did not struggle at all. Snacking after dinner, my biggest problem, my reward for what, getting through the day? It was GONE.

I was sailing along nicely. It was EASY to say no to cake, biscuits, etc. I hardly thought about it. I felt more in tune with my appetite. I did not need sugar in ANY of its forms, refined or otherwise.

I went on a trip to Edinburgh, had more carbs than usual, more alcohol, a couple of biscuits here and there. Why not, I’ve got this under control.

Yesterday I had a bit of baguette from the supermarket. Plain, supposedly French. It tasted so sweet, like it was loaded with sugar. I recall when I came to the UK over 9 years ago, that’s how I felt everything tasted, just so sweet. Yes, pastries and cakes are made with sugar, but to my tastebuds they tasted so much sweeter than the ones in Poland. Even popcorn at the cinema! [I never converted to sweet popcorn, it is vile.]

For the last couple of evenings, my sugar dragon has awakened once again. Suddenly I am craving my after-dinner reward. Once again my willpower is being tested. But it is OK, I tell myself, I’ve overindulged a bit for the last couple of weeks, but I am only human, I am not orthorexic. Make like Damon Gameau and just chill. Damon is the Australian mastermind behind Those Sugar Things mentioned earlier, he doesn’t eat sugar, or drink alcohol or caffeine.

In a few weeks we will be attending a vegetarian Thanksgiving party where I know what the food will be – proper carb and sugar overload. Sweet potato mash with marshmallows, sweet green beans, super-supersweet pecan pie and super-supersweet biscuits. We go there every year and every year I find everything way too sweet. Last year I was more hungover from the sugar than the booze. This year I am planning to take a veggie lasagna so I can have something to eat.

Sugar does not have me under control. I’ve got sugar under control.

Summer moved on

I am in a pretty good place right now. Summer is over, kids go back to school tomorrow. I paid attention to what I was eating but made plenty of room for treats. I fell ill once, it was after I devoured a good part of a large pizza, but after another day I was up and running [albeit with a small cough]. I had a few quite serious hangovers, I swear Polish booze is much stronger than British, which prompted me to have several days off from drinking. Driving is so much more fun, anyway [as opposed to drinking!].

I contemplated doing a September Whole30 [I attempted to do the January Whole30. I got to day 24 with food and day 27 without booze, but it backfired as I spent the first half of February hungover – more on that another time], but as I’ve mentioned several times previously, I can hardly be called an all-or-nothing girl. I do not have a weight problem or serious medical problems [Hashimoto’s is under control, I think], I know more or less which foods suit me and in what quantities, most importantly – I FEEL good most of the time, I am not depressed. I came back from my holiday without the usual brain fog. I have a slight pain in my neck but I’m sure that will go away.


OMG is this actually working again

I’ve tried to write several times but the website never seemed to work! Update soon!